Orchid Bay City
Nov. 9, 2005
Careful with that, you ignoramus! the cult leader exhorted as his minion gingerly sprinkled the dust upon the tiled floor. If you get any of that outside the lines, the ritual wont work at all! Jeez… havent any of you been in an unholy ritual before?
Ah, shaddap, his lackey replied dismissively. Stuffs a buncha hooey anyway… I mean, resurrecting an ancient evil?
Well, yeah, Bob, the leader replied. Thats the kind of thing cults do. Whyd you join anyway?
Im balding, okay? I wanted to have an excuse to shave my head.
Whatever. Your stupid sands on the floor now. Im outta here. The cultist left, in a huff.
Fine! I dont need you! Youre a big stupid jerk and I hate you! The leader (by now, a leader without anyone to lead) began lighting the candles needed. Soon, he stood, holding the gem above the pile of dust.
Oh, great one, he began, I summon you once again, to do my bidding. The Emerald of Osiris compels it!
The gem began to pulse with light. Slowly, the pile of dust began to flow together, taking the shape of a man. Bandages, seemingly woven from the air around, wrapped the figure from head to toe. Within the folds, eyes and teeth solidified.
Well, now, the mummy said, bury me with Roy Rogers an call me Trigger! The Emerald of Osiris! If that dont beat all! Ooo-ee, ththings I could do with this!
O, great and mighty Kohmen-Getit… grant me the wealth and power I desire!
Now, hold on, there, pardner… it dont quite work that way. The resurrected mummy leaned against the wall of the makeshift temple… actually, an abandoned subway station. Yall can only bring me bac Continue reading